Thursday, September 23


have you ever started a project, a path in life, made some amazing changes, experienced a significant emotional or spiritual shift, started to walk a different road,wanted to change the world, and....... felt pushback?

pushback, pushed back on your efforts.

you see, they tell you how when you walk the path of most authenticity, of what the universe asks of you, that you will be supported. things will click into place, you meet the right people, the cosmic channels align and things, just. work. out.

and this is true. i have experienced this over and over again.

but they rarely tell you about pushback, because it's a bit of a downer really.

along with all that good stuff falling into place, there is also the opposite.

knowing about it can help you understand what's going on. i know that even i have been taken unawares on many occassions.

recently, i moved into this enormous capacity for compassion, and i was shown a vision for empowering others, and well, i felt gooooood. it felt riiiiight. so when there was pushback, it was kinda confusing, you know?

you can work on your part in things, we all self-sabotage to some degree.
you can rant and rave - but i'm really a good person! or, but i'm walking my path!
you can shake your fists at the universe, at others, which is all fine. anger is a worthy emotion, otherwise we would take repeated slaps and injustices. there are martyrs and there are revolutionaries.

but pushback isn't there to befriend you. it isn't there to rationalise, be logical, reasonable, kind, understanding, or nice. it isn't there to hear you. you can throw love at it, kindness and empathy. you can throw patience at it, time, effort, work. no good.

it's there because you dared to do something audacious.

you decided and acted upon your Truth. you're walking your path. you were *shock horror*, courageous enough to DO something about and for the world. to put your money where your mouth is. and what you are doing will change the world, even in a small way.

you're creating art, you're writing your book, you start a business, you start a charity, you gather a circle, you head a campaign.
and these are not just hobbies, but gifts to others. energetically charged!
and guaranteed, someone will be jealous, you will be doubted, you'll be asked to be more than human, you'll be critised, you'll be laughed at, someone will be bitter, you'll lose a 'friend'. your reputation, your integrity, the real you, will all come into the firing line.

they'll want to hear love and kindness in only one melody. but there are mother theresa's and there are martin luther king's - you won't, and can't, suit everyone.

everyone who is that audacious experiences pushback. gandhi, princess diana, the guy down the road who started the soup kitchen. they all send out waves of love into the world, but they are also strong and know how to use bounderies. they're filled with kindness but aren't punching bags. they get angry, outraged even, and aren't afraid to step on toes. that kind of audacity, to live your truth and be fully human, makes ripples and scares others. and where there's fear there's hatred.

why does anyone carry on? why should you carry on?

because the support from the universe is greater, because the rewards are greater.

because anything less is a life half lived.


  1. thank you! yes! until now i never knew what pushback was. it always felt like i was being "put in my place", being "brought down a notch or two". those were/still are favorite phrases of my mother who, well, likes to put me in my place when my "britches get too big". and so in my mind, errm, the mind of that terrified and humiliated little girl, the Universe was just validating everything she had ever done to keep me small and weak. uggg! the bullshit never ends it seems. well, steady on then! there's nothing for it, but to put the wellies on again and move forward through the muck.

    Mon, thank you :)

  2. Oh.My. Perhaps that's why I fear "greatness" (whatever that may mean to little ole me). I grew up walking the path most traveled...the one in the middle, the one forged by another, the middle-class path. Where I followed and didn't lead. And just when I think I could step off onto the shoulder or heaven forbid, start clearing my own little road...I fear the pushback and it keeps my feet on solid and sure ground. Thanks for this. I'm hoping it will help place my whole foot, instead of my toe, in the brambles and as ladybug-zen said, put the wellies on and move forward through the muck.

  3. Oh yes, I sooo know pushback (I jst never had a name for it)! I think pushback is (partly) why so many people mistrust their intuition. Like you said, pushback isn't talked about very often, so people assume they've gotten their intuition wrong/ it wasn't intuition at all.

    I'm a bit of a scaredy cat in face of opposition (mother issues, but that's a story for another day), so I usually keep those life changing events to myself as much as possible (even if it means biting my tongue, sometimes even being a little two faced, with others), but I have come to look at opposition, or pushback, as a tool to test my resolve, or the power of the thing in question.

  4. ladybug-zen
    ooh, 'brought down a notch or two', that riles me up! :) our parents voices are soooo loud. how dare you be BIG! shout back - i dare! ;)

    well yes. with greatness you're just asking for attention, and with attention comes.... pushback.

    like Carin suggests, it could be a test of our resolve.
    God/universe asking - are you serious about this?

  5. Thanks, Mon, for this. This post is extremely relevant for me right now. I experience a huge pushback last week and it made me want to "hide", but I stayed strong and didn't hide. I'm going to carry on. Thanks for the encouragement through this post.

  6. Amen Sister! Your last line totally sums it up ... "Because anything less is a life half lived." An important reminder when the setbacks rear their ugly heads :)

  7. I've experienced this many times in my life, but the particular experience that comes to my mind is when I decided to go after a degree in photography. I had no money, was in debt, didn't qualify for a loan, had a low-paying job. But I didn't give up (hurray for determination!). I took prerequisites one at a time, until I married my husband and he put me through school. Eventually it did all work together for me. Then when starting my business, I got pregnant, another pushback.

    I wonder, if perhaps the pushback isn't just an opportunity to reflect and determine whether or not we really DO want to carry on. If we determine that we are certain, even in the face of opposition, we can muster the strength we need to carry on to see it through the next pushback. In the case of school, I knew it was what I truly wanted, and that knowledge carried me through some hard times. In the case of my business, I haven't decided yet.

    When I was younger, I think I let pushbacks get the better of me. Photography school was a turnaround point for me, I think. Good, good thoughts here, way to put it in perspective. Lovely picture, btw.

  8. thanks for this post Monica - so timely.
    Why is it that just when you are feeling comfortable in your decisions and the way your life is going that someone then comes along and gives you a 'pushback'? Like, why do they feel the need to temper your enthusiasm? I used to think that it was my fault that I made them feel this way. Now I look at the situation and if I have been acting true to myself then i realise that it is something in them. I now try to have compassion for their reasons for acting this way but instead of giving in to 'keep the peace' or 'walking on eggshells' to prevent uncomfortable feelings emerging, I try not to take these reactions so personally.

    I agree with you and try to see these instances as a test of my resolve and strength of my convictions. Why, after-all, should we give up our dreams and the life we want to live because of someone else's reaction?

  9. yes...many experiences with pushback lately. i've decided that some of the people that are pushing back are actually responding to their own fears...and speaking to them.

    it also helps to remember that in the past, those who have doubted the most became supporters (or beneficiaries!) of the effort/project in the end.

    unfortunately, however, i am often an emotional mess in the process.

  10. What an amazing post.

    "you decided and acted upon your Truth. you're walking your path. you were *shock horror*, courageous enough to DO something about and for the world. to put your money where your mouth is. and what you are doing will change the world, even in a small way."

    Love Love Love this part especially. Personally, I have been pushedback one too many times by the universe, but I will not give up. My truth and my path are just that, MINE. When I was younger I would not have understood these words. I wanted to please people, I wanted everyone to like me. I guess I'm what ya call an extrovert tell it like I see it kindof person and most REALLY don't want the TRUTH unless it has some sugar coating on it. I do not harbor bitterness or ill feeling for those who just "Dont get me". They don't have too. I am who I am and I love who I am. I indeed did do something about it, and I'm better for it.

    Thanks--I needed this one right now.

  11. Janice, yes, pushbacks generally make us want to run and hide. even the courageous amongst us. i think especially because it's a pushback with something that has somuch meaning to us, so we're vulnerable.

    "If we determine that we are certain, even in the face of opposition, we can muster the strength we need to carry on to see it through the next pushback."

    yes, i do think it builds our strength and confidence.

    "I now try to have compassion for their reasons for acting this way"

    yes! when we feel good about what we're doing, listening to our intuition, i think it becomes easier to separate the personal from such situations. we don't need to view the other person as the enemy, but we can remain strong in what we need to do. compassion goes a long way.

  12. there seems to be a lot of this happening these days in the lives of several people I know. I've experienced this more times than I care to count as well and know just how discouraging it can be - if it comes from people or from things that just happen to throw you off - but your take here is heartening and encouraging and I hope to share it with a few people who could really use that right now. Thanks for writing it and sharing it with all of us.

  13. Pushbacks gave us the time to reflect and get downed by the crab mentalists around us, so we can have a climax in our own triumphant stories.


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