Monday, August 23

mama records: toilet learning

day 1:
mama buys toilet seat.
girlchild sits happily on seat and tries to go. knows exactly what to do.
but nothing there. not 30mins later either.
child bored.

evening
girchild sits on loo for 40mins reading and been read to.
tinkle occurs by default.
girlchild mildly interested.
mama pleased.

day 2:
girlchild sit on loo and after 45mins, a tinkle.
mama thinks, this seems so disconnected.

evening
girlchild going for a #2, mama scoops her up and attempts to place her on loo to screams and general protest.

aftermath: "not going toilet anymore"
marvelous.

mama decides there must be a better way anyway.

Mission: aborted



3 weeks pass....

mama thinks that intuitive relieving must be better than going by default.
i intellectualised it with the toilet seat idea.

day 1:
mama asks daddy to buy potty.
daddy brings home potty.
girlchild suspicious of potty.
potty allowed to sit and settle in.

evening
diaper removed
2 spills
girlchild understands mess has occured, uses potty at next encouragement.
immediate results pleases her. bingo.
mutual happy-dance ensues. (feet stomping and clapping).
bed.

day 2:
potty used first thing.
1 and 1/2 spills.
mama encourages use throughout morning. girlchild uses.

afternoon
girlchild stating 'need a wee'.
mama taking to potty.

day 3:
girlchild requests potty upon waking!
butt nekked child running through garden. glee occurs.

evening
girlchild going entirely on her own.

discounting failed first attempt, toilet learning achieved in 34hrs.

Mission: successful

or, partially successful. #2 in potty hasn't occured.
she's very particular about this personal business. she isn't fearing the potty for this, and knows what she's supposed to do, but isn't entirely convinced. i think it's something about the position.
no pressure from us, but.... 4 days without. she became constipated. argh.
finally went last night at 1:30am in diaper.

so still need to work on phase two, for #2s.

i've always preferred, for my child, that she learns what her body needs (although, i do wish i had ignored child-lead weaning).
rather than giving cues to relieve herself, or waiting for things to just happen to occur, i felt this worked for us because she felt the need to go herself and had immediate relief. totally understood her body.

......

had to have a c-section, breastfeeding failed, doesn't sleep longer than 2.5hrs during night, barely eats solids (she was 2 in april), so to say mama is (in her mind) dancing on a tabletop and singing songs of joy, would be an understatement.

now, to convince her to put clothes on.....

22 comments:

  1. Hi Mon, I thought my little one would be in nappies for ever and then suddenly about a week ago she said to me, "no more nappies mama!" and guess what no more nappies since!!! This makes traveling life a lot easier I can tell you and being in India there is no shortage of corners where a little toddler can squat!
    Great to be reading you again :)

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  2. Love how you documented your little girl's potty journey :) I'm in the midst of this currently with my little guy.
    Peace.

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  3. global mama - wait, you're in India!? thought you were still in germany. hope you'll blog a little soon. missed you.

    erin good luck. it's a fun step.

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  4. oh lordy...the JOY of being diaper-free...lol

    #2 is always the most difficult, it seems...Savannah ended up constipated and Sebastian downright refused and would ask for a diaper to poop in. it definitely has something to do with the position....and apparently there's a sensation of having lost control of their body somehow? can't remember where i read that. but it's true...Sebastian would look almost panicked when he first decided to poop on the loo. and that was by accident because he was at my sister's and she ran out of diapers...lol

    if you can find the book Everyone Poops --it's FAB!

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  5. Hmmm.... we tried it, didn't like it so moved on!!! The story of my life I am afraid. Loving India though and have actually managed to post my first blog today... :)

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  6. congratulations, how wonderful! I empathise with your happiness!! but why would you want her to wear clothes? would you wear clothes if you had to? ;-)

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  7. heehee, i was thinking it might be nice for when we went grocery shopping.

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  8. Every child is different, my eldest was a duplicate of your wildflower, no sleep, poor/random eater, refuser of toilets and potties, while my youngest son slept through from 9 weeks, ate solids almost as soon as feasibly possible, refused to wear a nappy from 2 years old and was dry at night from then too.

    They are so different, they both brought with them their own foibles and their own delights, and yes I also danced on the table when my eldest started to use the toilet under his own will rather than relying on a nappy or encouragement from us - it will happen as will wearing clothes!
    x

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  9. Oh, who needs clothes! lol. Our son still hasn't quite mastered pulling down his pants, so pantless is working quite well for us...though I do tire of the neighbor kids asking why he's naked...so, yeah, clothes are kind of nice in that way.

    Anyway...I think it makes sense to allow her to feel the need to go and be aware that messes occur if she doesn't use the toilet. That's essentially how I did it with Michael, even after EC and all that.

    People can be so particular about where they poop. Lucky for me, Michael has always preferred the potty (and even preferred to go at home after only a few months), but you can see how a child would get attached to the diaper. It's probably only a matter of time till she's comfortable enough to go in the potty, don't you think?

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  10. Oh my, when my daughter was going through toilet training I was constantly amazed anyone ever successfully navigated those waters! We didn't have problems with the poo (she did that on her second birthday w/o coaxing) but i swear because i was instigating things, the pee would never cease! Ah... memories of afternoons by the wading pool, a naked girl being plied by glass after glass of lemonade (a real treat) and the potty sitting decoratively next to the grill awaiting use ...

    love this ... such memories. And whenever my daughter gets together with her oldest friend, they seem to strip down immediately for really free play!

    good job mama! xo Lis

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  11. Potty training is one of my least favorite parenting duties. I get so stressed out. What if they never learn. What if they are 27 and still won't potty!

    But it's all worked out twice. ;)

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  12. Way to go! It sounds like she learned quickly. Your approach seemed like a gentle and well thought out one.

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  13. What a happy story! Makes me want to do a wee dance too :). I really like the relationship you facilitate between yourself and WF. It seems to really nurture understanding. I like that.

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  14. Excellent news. It's always so good when they get out of nappies. Hurrah for you!
    Beanie did it herself when she was ready. We just had the potty around and when she was naked, she would use it. Eventually, she told us she didn't want to wear nappies anymore and then, about 4 months ago, stopped wearing them to bed and gets herself up in the night to go if she needs to now. Mind you, we started the process at 2 and she was totally dry by 3 and a half.

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  15. Oh and there's an award for you over at my place.

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  16. any day now for us...or so i say every time i buy new diapers.

    i remember my oldest nephew saying, "oops, i need that back", when learning #2 at my house!

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  17. lol, enjoyed hearing your experiences!

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  18. hehe...thoroughly enjoyed this. Have to admit though, I can't even remember how we did this. Tis a dim, dark and distant memory all that toddler stuff. Wouldn't have a clue as to how to go about it again. Remember torrents of wee on shoes for a bit there. Somehow we all manage to use the toilet at some point, which is extraordinary really when you think about it.

    Btw - I love the new look! Muchly.

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  19. Was always a crazy time for me with potty training the kids. Wish you tons of luck :)

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  20. Fantastic.
    Mine turned 3 today and on Sunday (her bday party - she said she's a big girl now and doesn't want diapers at night!!!) I went with it but explained that she will have to wake up now in the middle of the night to pee).
    Would you believe she called at 4:30 am for me - I guided her to the bathroom and she peed ;) Last night, same thing no diaper and she slept the whole night - all nice and dry in the morning.
    I am so proud - this is my bday gift from her ;)
    With day time potty training she was also brilliant and out of the diaper at about 2 1/2. #2 was harder - she got too good at holding that it formed a lot of constipation and I helped her by actually encouraging her to do it in the diaper. She relaxed way more and eventually when she was ready used the potty. Some bribing went along with that step ;)

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  21. it's so funny hw at the time it's all huge, then over the years it blurs under a million other developments.

    ella, ah, excellent. i trust mine will do #2 when she's ready. i've kept all pressure out of it.

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  22. I've been kind of waiting for this day too! I was just curious how you - and Wildflower - would approach it. My eldest was so easy - in retrospect it seems like I just explained to her what it was for and she started using it. I'm sure it wasn't that easy, but memory does blur with with:-) The twins were more of a challenge, each in their own way...my baby girl didn't go #2 in it for many months, long past the point when she was doing #1 regularly there on her own...I let it go entirely for awhile as she was starting to freak about it...then decided to resort to rewards (purple balloons in her case.) It worked - three purple balloons and she was sold (and forgot all about the purple balloons within a week....)

    Anyway, happy dance for you!

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