yikes, i've been away for a week. in-laws are still here, it's scorching hot, our neighbour from the previous post passed away and we had the funeral yesterday. it was a great turn out. he'll be missed by us.
so i'm a little late on this one...
juliana at shakti mama is hosting a self-portrait challenge which has several of us taking deep breaths but having fun too.
my physical mask is my hair..... a useful mask and a not so great one.
i like to melt into the shadows and my hair serves as a cloak. but it's also my i-know-i'm-not-much-to-look at and i-have-bad-skin mask. it isn't self-loathing, i've never been that way. more of a matter-of-fact realism. i don't use it so much in that way any more, but i would never pin my hair all the way. besides it's bloody uncomfortable to me, i feel very exposed, and feel that my not-so-great-face is too exposed.
the perfect porcelian blemish-free skin is part of our social pressures of beauty as much as a perfect anything else.
i have come a long way. i embrace my wrinkles at least. completely. each has it's own story. and it's not even so much hating my skin but hating that someone else can't hear me past staring at a huge pimple on my head or something. you know?
but my hair mask is part of who i am, part of my heritage, the women in the family.... i'm okay with it, because i've learnt to love myself.