Monday, November 17

our babies as teachers

I believe that children choose us when they are still only souls. That is, for whatever reason, that soul finds a need in a specific human and chooses to go there, to be birthed as a human in our world.

I also believe that something within us calls out for them.

Whether you believe this or not doesn't matter. It certainly isn't a Hard Belief for me, just a thought. Whatever the inner needs of the souls, my musings last night were that we learn from our babies.

I'm not referring to the interesting things children say that make us think, but rather who they are as little personalities. How their behaviours, the ones that seem innate to them, spark off inner triggers within us.

Our children are sources of learning, even as babies.

Perhaps you had/have a baby that is fussy, high-spirited, impatient, loud, boisterous, or even shy, quiet, slow to excite. Perhaps your little one has a serious condition, or is often ill. Perhaps she was born early and needed extra care.

Perhaps the evidence for learning is so subtle you might not think there is any there. Perhaps your child is happy and is easily content.

My own Wildflower, as my little nickname for her implies, is spirited. She is a typical Aries in that she is loud and wants it Now, whatever It might be. She is also a chronic restless sleeper.

I pondered about what opportunity for learning has been provided for me whilst she is an infant.

I thought perhaps it was the opportunity to truly be in the Now. Although I have practiced mindfulness for some time, I know that before motherhood, I was always many steps ahead. While I might still do that in some areas of my life, I have been forced to meet the true Now.

This is not a Now of books and theories. It's not a Now of any religion or guru.

It is the simple breath of a moment between me and her.
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It is attending to whatever she needs that second because she might only let me know that second and not a moment sooner. It is surrendering to the power and the powerlessness of being unable and unwilling to control another.

She is both wholly dependent and wholly independent of me. And the Now is that space inbetween those states.

My baby is my teacher.

3 comments:

  1. Yes!

    Such a beautiful picture. I relax just looking at it.

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  2. If I hadn't had my spirited, stubborn, difficult second child, our life would be so much different than it is now. I was led to learn so much. She made me much more gentle that I used to be in some ways and patient and we were introduced to a natural lifestyle through researching how to comfort/help/deal with her. I'm profoundly grateful for that. On the flip-side, when I found out that we were unexpectedly expecting a new baby and our difficult girl wasn't quite two yet, we were freaked out. Thankfully our third is the sweetest and most mellow of the three. Something we really needed!

    So, I think you are right!

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  3. Excellent Lisa! Thanks for sharing that.
    A friend of ours alos had a very sensitive and challenging first baby, and then the 2nd is very placid. Perhaps some parents need to earn that 2nd placid aby, LOL.

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